An undated Post-It note from Alistair Darling to Gordon Brown stuck on the Prime Minister's computer screen with the words

is to be offered for sale on Ebay with a reserve price of £100bn, sources claim.

An expert in paying off government debt told this newspaper:

"If someone buys it for £100bn that would reduce the government's borrowing requirement by half over night, a record."

Bidding for the note started at 99p at 6am this morning.

Un Ruddy Believable! What A Load Of Old Poo

Ye Gods. The worst budget in history made us all vomit.

Sickness dripped from every computer in the newsroom yesterday lunchtime.

It was the worst mass sickness we have ever had here at the Daily Moan.

12 years of New Labour has led to the worst bout of vomit and diarrhoea in the history of this newspaper.

Gordon Brown, Tony Blair, I hope you are satisfied.

Not only have you destroyed the economy, you have made us all into vomiting wrecks.

Wwwhhhhuuurrrghhhh ggghhhhh!