They can't bloody sing. They can't bloody dance. They look like they've got bleedin bird's nests on their heads.
They are by all standards, useless.
That's why we at the Daily Moan are giving Jedward our complete support.
There's nobody on X Factor 2009 that quite piques our moaning muscles as much as Jedward.
If they were kicked off the show we wouldn't have anything to moan about.
We could quite simply moan about them on every page every day for the rest of the year.
How many other celebrities, other than Katie Price and Kerry Katona, could you say that about?
They are absolute gems of moananity.
They are quite simply the most awful contestants in the history of the bloody competition.
Gawdon Brown, they are crap.
Awful, hopeless. They will go far.