David Cameron called the National Bullying Helpline 'up to 10 times' after being repeatedly bullied by the prime minister during prime minister's questions in Parliament, it was believed last night.

A spokesman for the helpline said

"We cannot for obvious reasons go into the specific details. All I can say is that a posh caller called Dave from London regularly phoned up the helpline on Wednesday afternoons for a short period in 2008: he was regularly in tears."

Prime Minister Slapped Me Across The Face And Told Me To Calm Down, Says Aid

The Prime Minister slapped the face of an hysterical homosexual called Sebastian after he started screaming, if scenes from Little Britain had been reenacted for real by the actual Prime Minister Gordon Brown, it was claimed last night.

If what had previously been thought to be a fictitious comedy sketch had actually been enacted, this could spell the end of the Prime Minister's attempts at reinventing his grumpy-but-busy character.

Beating up homosexuals in the cabinet office is widely frowned upon since Margaret Thatcher left office in 1992.

In other developments:

Speaking on the Andrew Marr show yesterday, Lord Mandelson skillfully stepped around the question "Has Gordon Brown ever hit you," by saying, "Hit me?" and then Marr didn't think of following the question up, with "Yes, did Gordon Brown ever hit you?" The answer, as anybody who has ever seen Little Britain, is yes, and a well deserved slap it was too.