BBC Reveals 'All Singing And Dancing' Cookery Show The Day After Delia Leaves

The BBC has announced plans to screen the world's first daily musical cookery show, the day after Delia Smith reportedly vows to never make another cookery show again for the BBC.

The show, Les Eatables, will go out at 5pm on weekdays and will show people cooking while singing and dancing.

Contestants on the show will be invited to cook dishes decided by judges on the programme, and, while they cook, they will sing songs and dance.

A producer told The Boobs: "We've done cooking, what more can we do with a pan of boiling ******* water? We want to bring West End glamour to the kitchen."

Correction: In an article "Forces Of Light Fight Off The Nasti Party Over Gay Marriage Vote" we made a number of errors: David Cameron's middle name is not Franzipan; the stopping distance in wet conditions when a typical family saloon is traveling at 65mph is not three and a half miles; and, in the odd one out round, Darleks were the odd one out because they can't go up the stairs.

King In Car Park Special: Plantagenet Dynasty 'Relief' After It Is Revealed Richard III Found In Long Stay Section

Richard III was found in the long stay section of the car park in Leicester and not in the short stay part, saving the Plantagenet dynasty potentially 'all the money there is in the world', according to quick calculations by NCP last night.

500 years in a short stay section would be so expensive NCP don't have a computer to even handle the number, we were told.

500 years in the long stay section would be only about £500 billion, an expert said last night.

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