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Margaret Thatcher Dies, Letters 10th April 2013

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Margaret Thatcher dies following a strike, according to BBC - via @HeardinLondon    
BBC Mistake
 

Maggie Maggie Maggie

FREE INSIDE TODAY - SOUVINIR EDITION OF DEATH OF THATCHER

Dully Mirror

Thatcher Still Running The Country Until Last Week

Baroness Thatcher was still telling David Cameron how to run the country until last Friday, it was revealed last night.

Speaking in an interview about the former PM, Cameron, £45 million, said she told him to 'ditch the coalition' and 'shut down the mines' again.

"You are not unpopular enough, I would have been at least 10% less popular than you at this point in the election cycle," Thatcher chided Cameron, and then told him how to become even more unpopular:

  • Tax Dancing In The Streets
  • Privatise Liverpool
  • Sell Scotland

Did You Know? Margaret Thatcher never went to Thatcher Road in Margate, her almost namesake.

Correction: In our article yesterday entitled: Bing Bong The Witch Is Dead, we incorrectly failed to quote the Wizard Of Oz classic accurately. It should of course have been Ding Dong.

Out Out Out

INSIDE TODAY - THIS PAPER ARGUES THAT LADY THATCHER'S FUNERAL WITH FULL MILITARY HONOURS WILL LOOK EXACTLY LIKE A STATE FUNERAL ANYWAY SO WATSALLTHEFUSSABOUT?

The Eeekonomist (spoof of The Economist)

Ching Chong The Fitch Is Dead

There were calls in China, yesterday, for the death of Fitch, a ratings agency, soon after it downgraded Chinese Renminbi debt again, in one of the most controversial China based accounting decisions for many years.

Fitch downgraded China's credit rating from AAaaahh to Aaaahhhooohargh+.

Security at Fitch has been increased in fear of reprisals, and all passwords have been changed from 'password' or '123' to something more secure.

Also in today's paper:

Room In Which Thatcher Died At Ritz To Be Hired Out For 80's Themed Yuppie Parties, Claim

Revealed: Thatcher's Last Read

Dancing In The Street Should Be Taxed, Osborne Told

Letters Maggie

INSIDE TODAY - VOTE FOR A FULL STATE FUNERAL FOR MARGARET THATCHER INSIDE TODAY

Daily Moan (The Daily Mail)

Letters To The Editor

Dear Sir,

I had a violent argument with a bloke at work about whether it is Lady Thatcher or Baroness Thatcher? The divisiveness just keeps'a getting worse.

Yours, Brendon Sage

Dear Sir,

Further to your thoroughly average article about Asda Value Corned Beef. What exactly is the Corned bit? Surely they have been putting all sorts of evil things in the Corned bit for years? What's the fuss now?

Yours, Jerry Jones

Dear Sir,

May I be the first to write in to complain that the weather is going to be far too clement next week.

Yours, Jenny Butler