Is it really necessary for us to have to print this picture of Sven having sex?

Enough is enough. As you know mate, just like you, we like nothing better than a couple of nice big tits. But, quite frankly, Sven is now getting too much sex even for us. Having an affair without your employers permission is just not on, especially if they end up lying when gossiping about you behind your back, and even more especially when Sven is earning more than all of us put together. Whilst Sven is shagging he can't possibly be doing his job. Being England manager is a painful experience and it looks to us like Sven is having too much fun. We want sweat and tears, is that too much to ask for?

(Opinion©Sun Newspapers (Australia))