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August 2006
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Death Averted

FREE SPOONFUL OF HOUMOUS FOR EVERY READER
Daily Stir (spoof of Daily Star)
Yearly BA Peak Holiday Delays Get Government Approval
Prayatorial

Queues, some as long as three weeks, were in evidence at Heathrow again today, exactly in every detail just like last year, but this year it was different because this year it wasn't because of an industrial dispute, but because of the possibility of death and carnage on a scale so big it would take a Mount Everest sized piece of paper to draw on a graph.

Bloody, horrific, deaths at high altitude, possibly as high as 37,000 feet, were in prospect had police, some in raids as big as 250 officers to a semi-detached, not raided and arrested as many as 21 suspects in dawn raids at dawn this morning.

The countless, senseless, deaths, had they occurred, would have served as a reminder of how vulnerable we all are to the threat of terror in the skies.

In the event, thankfully, there were no deaths, just no drinks on board, no moisture in the in-flight food and nothing to do with your hands but to pray to almighty God that this disaster, which could have dehydrated so many, was not the result of a strike, like it normally is, but because of a threat so terrible even words can't express how awful it could have been.

This is Cilla Peasbody, Daily Stir, in a flummox.

10 August

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