The Home Office had to admit last night that it has lost track of as many as 17 schizophrenics who believe that Gordon Brown is the devil incarnate and has to be assassinated.

This is just the latest in an upcoming long line of further problems expected to be announced over the coming months.

John Reid is expected to challenge Gordon Brown for leader of the Labour Party when Tony Blair resigns later in the year, but only if Brown lives that long.....