The Sun: Ola Chutney, how's things?

Chuckie: That's Chuckie, idiot.

The Sun: So, tell me, mate, what did Jose do then? Were those bastards trying to kidnap you then? Mustav been a hell of a kerfuffle, yes?

Chuckie: Oh it was a bit of a brawl, yes. Arms and legs flailing about. Nobody got punched, it was more of a pushing thing. I barked a lot, I can tell you, I mean, can you believe it, all this in front of the neighbours? So, quite frankly I could take it no more and scarpered.

The Sun: Yea I read that. So you ran away then did you?

Chuckie: Yes I did. I ran like the wind. I suppose you think because I'm only a small yappy type dog that I run out of puff after a little run, but I can tell you Jose does do great conditioning. I can run solid for 15 minutes at a time.

© News International 2007.