Spoitez le difference:

Unhappy Frog Happy Ros Beef

The French, some as young as 2 months old, were crying in the streets last night, some, but not all, completely unawares that their team had just lost to old foe England in the World Cup Semi Finals currently being staged in Paris, last night, and for the previous six weeks and for another week to come.

France, who can now count to the number trois for the times they have lost to Angletere in a Rugby Union World Cup Semi- Final, were disconsolate, some, but not all, unable to bake even those quick tap and unwrap chocolate croissants they do in the chiller cabinet in some shops (or do they call them Pain au Chocolat? the French were all too upset to answer my questions when I asked it last night). Even more couldn't eat them even if they could be baked in the first place.

Baguettes, some as old as thirty-five minutes, were left in bakey-shops across the land and the wailing of nuns, goats and winemakers punctured the silence in some of the quieter parts of the French nation.

A national day of mourning in France has been declared for Monday. All English supporters currently in France are being asked to keep the noise down on Monday to allow France to come to terms with their loss.

The French dream is dead, long live the Jonny.