Now, I know how this must sound, a nation grieving and all.

And I am sure that Jeremy Beadle was a really nice guy and all. Just, and may God have mercy on my soul, there's a part of me that expects that this is all just another one of his practical jokes.

Does this make me a bad person?

I mean, when he was on Game For A Laugh didn't they once do something like this? Fake someone's death and all?

I mean, wouldn't it be understandable for us to want to be absolutely sure before we get out the tissues?

I'm not really sure what I'm suggesting here, it just, well, I don't want to mourn him if this is all a joke, are you with me?

So, in view of this uncertainty, this newspaper won't be saying good-bye to Jeremy Beadle just yet, just to be on the safe side.

I mean, what's the chances of him jumping out of his coffin at his funeral?

Or him being the priest in the church for the service?

I mean we are talking about a guy who once had an exact replica of a guy's car dumped in the river while he watched just to see his reaction. Pip pip...