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World's Funniest Jokes, from THE UK's Satire Channel |
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Top 20 Pick Up Lines (Unlikeliest To Work), Men For Women (15)
1. That dress would look great on the floor next to my bed. 2. Hand over a card that says: "Smile if you want to sleep with me." And watch her try to hold back a laugh. 3. Would you like gin and platonic or do you prefer scotch and sofa? 4. Hey babe...can you suck start a Harley? 5. Excuse me. Do you want to f**k or should I apologise? 6. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? 7. I love every bone in your body - especially mine. 8. Would you like to dance or should I go f**k myself again? 9. Hey babe...can you suck a golf ball thru 50 feet of garden hose? 10. A women asks, "Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?" 11. Bond. James Bond. 12. Nice shoes, wanna f**k? 13. I wanna floss with your pubic hair. 14. Excuse me, have I f**ked you yet? 15. Hi, I make more money than you can spend. 16. Hi! Can I buy you a car? 17. I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment? 18. Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) 'Cause I could see myself in your pants. 19. Really like your peaches, wanna shake your tree. 20. I am a magical being, take off your bra.
Selected and reordered from a larger collection at The Comedy Corner.
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