Famous People On Sex… (15)

Steve Martin: “You know “that look” women get when they want sex? Me neither.”

Woody Allen: “Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.”

Roseanne: “Women complain about pre-menstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.”

Lynn Lavner: “There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL.”

Jack Nicholson: “My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.”

Matt Barry: “Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist.”

Camille Paglia: “Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.”

George Burns: “Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant.”

Sharon Stone: “Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships.”

Rod Stewart: “Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.”

Rodney Dangerfield: “Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.”

Steve Jobs (Founder, Apple Computers): “My girlfriend always laughs during sex --- no matter what she's reading.”

Robin Williams: “Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.”

Billy Crystal: “Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.”

Robert De Niro: “According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.”

Dustin Hoffman: “There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?”

Jerry Seinfeld: “There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing; just show me somebody naked.'"

Robin Williams: “See, the problem is that God gives man a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”