Top 20 Pick Up Lines (Unlikeliest To Work), Men For Women (15)

1. That dress would look great on the floor next to my bed.

2. Hand over a card that says: "Smile if you want to sleep with me." And watch her try to hold back a laugh.

3. Would you like gin and platonic or do you prefer scotch and sofa?

4. Hey babe...can you suck start a Harley?

5. Excuse me. Do you want to f**k or should I apologise?

6. Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

7. I love every bone in your body - especially mine.

8. Would you like to dance or should I go f**k myself again?

9. Hey babe...can you suck a golf ball thru 50 feet of garden hose?

10. A women asks, "Excuse me, do you have the time?" You: "Do you have the energy?"

11. Bond. James Bond.

12. Nice shoes, wanna f**k?

13. I wanna floss with your pubic hair.

14. Excuse me, have I f**ked you yet?

15. Hi, I make more money than you can spend.

16. Hi! Can I buy you a car?

17. I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?

18. Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) 'Cause I could see myself in your pants.

19. Really like your peaches, wanna shake your tree.

20. I am a magical being, take off your bra.


Selected and reordered from a larger collection at The Comedy Corner.